Personal Development, Motivation & Happiness Blog

Top 10 Most Popular Life Goals

Life Goals

According to the data collected on 43things.com the 10 most popular life goals are as follows:

1. Lose Weight
2. Write A Book
3. Stop Procrastinating
4. Fall In Love
5. Be Happy
6. Get A Tattoo
7. Go On A Road Trip With No Predetermined Destination
8. Get Married
9. Travel The World
10. Drink More Water

I think depending on what stage of your life you are at, your goals will change and evolve. But I am willing to bet that almost anyone who has ever set goals for themselves can related to at least 3 of the above goals.

So here is the big questions

What are you doing to get one step closer to your goals?

Please share your thoughts below.

• Can you related to at least three of the above goals?
• Are you working towards any goals right now? If so what are you doing to get closer to your goal or goals?
• Do you have any advice you would like to share on working towards a goal or goals?

5 Steps to a More Positive Day

(Photo: Cathy)

Learn How To Have A More Positive Day

Have you always wondered how some people always seem to be happy?  Have you ever caught yourself with a negative attitude that lingers for most of the day?  Do you want to uncover ways that you can be more happy even during the most difficult of days?

Below are five steps you can take everyday to make your attitude and spirits more positive.  Give them a try.  You never know, they just might make you one of those “happy” people!

1.) Wake up and Smile

Put a note next to your alarm clock that reminds you to smile when you wake up.  You have a lot to be grateful for, and most important of these things is your life.  You have a new day and a new opportunity to do great things.  There is no better way to show your appreciation for all this than with a smile.  And there is certainly no better way to start your day on a positive note!

2. ) Write Out Your Thoughts

There’s undoubtedly a lot going on in your head, even when you first wake up in the morning.  Both consciously and subconsciously there are a lot of things taking up valuable space in your mind.  Some of these things are positive, while others are troubling.  The troubling things will cause needless worry and anxiety unless they are dumped from your brain in a positive way.

I like to start my day by writing out all my thoughts.  I don’t stop writing until I am done.  I write several pages the old fashioned way, with pen and paper.  When I’m finished, it’s amazing how light and free my mind feels!  This is because I have freed up valuable real estate.  This allows me to focus on what I need to get done to make the day successful.  I highly recommend you give this exercise a try.

3.)  Repeat Your Positive Thoughts

Repetition is the key to learning.  Throughout the day, you will certainly be repeating many thoughts over and over in your head.  Unfortunately, most people tend to repeat negative thoughts.  You may recall days when you’ve repeated the same fear, or the same worry, many times over.  Perhaps you were nervous about something you were going to do later that day, so you repeated all the negative thoughts surrounding this event as it neared.

Instead, you should challenge yourself to repeat only positive thoughts.  If you catch yourself with a negative thought, put a spin on it.  If you’re nervous about something you have to do, imagine it being finished.  Even better, imagine it actually going well!  Then repeat that experience in your brain several times throughout the day.  This will not only calm you, it will also put you in a better position for success.

4.)  Do the Most Important and Difficult Things First

Often times, the most important things you need to do in the day are also the most difficult.  There is a reason for this.  It is easy to do the easy things, so no one has a problem doing them; therefore, the easy things are rarely important.  It’s the difficult things that could make or break your day, and you know this.  As a result, you put them off.  You wait for the time to be just right to do them.  You wait for yourself to be in the proper mood to get them done with the most energy and enthusiasm.

But it is rare that you ever find that “just right” time.  What happens when you put these difficult tasks off until late in the day is you make them sit in the back of your mind.  You dread knowing that eventually you are going to have to do these things, and this thought sits with you the whole day.

Yet if you simply do the most important things first, you free the dread from your mind and you set your day up to be very productive.  Perhaps new opportunities will open up for you.  Maybe you’ll be able to spend a little more time relaxing.  One thing’s for sure, by getting the difficult tasks out of the way early, each subsequent task will be much more enjoyable.

5.)  Take Some Time Out to Laugh

Even if your day is highly stressful, even if it seems everything is going wrong; take a minute to just have a laugh and realize things really aren’t as bad as you’re making them out to be.

I remember one time I was having one of those “Murphy’s Law” kind of days.  Actually, it was a rather terrible week.  Everything that could possibly go wrong, did.  Or so it seemed.  And so, I spent some time wallowing in self-pity and went onto Facebook to share my bad vibes with my friends by posting my status: “when it rains, it pours.”  Then, as I was walking home that night all sullen and deflated, the skies opened up and brought about a huge deluge on torrential rain.  Without an umbrella, I thought to myself “It just never ends.”  But then I remembered the Facebook status that I had just posted and realized that it had become literal.  It didn’t just rain, it poured.  And with that, I had a laugh.  I thought Mother Nature was really starting to mess with me.  This was the end of my downer attitude.

Laughter really is an amazing thing.  It makes you temporarily forget your worries and your fears.  It makes you more comfortable in uncomfortable situations.  It lifts your spirits and improves your mood.  It makes other people like to be around you and helps you like to be around other people.  Laughter is friendly and warm.  It makes you feel lighter, physically and emotionally.

So when things aren’t going so well, or even if they are, take a step back from your day and have a laugh.  Have a laugh with a friend, or even with yourself.  Just remember to relax and let it loose.

Remember, things are only as good as you make them out to be.  You have the power to make your day as positive as you want it to be.  Have fun, relax, and enjoy!  Each day is special; each moment, unique.

About the Author
Matt Maresca is a motivational entertainer who seeks every opportunity to inspire others with his unique philosophy on life. His website on motivation aims to put a unique spin on the world of personal development. For more from Matt, please visit: http://www.MyLifeMotivation.com.

Top 10 Best Forgiveness Quotes

(Photo: Ryan Jesena)

Definition of Forgiveness: The process of concluding resentment, indignation or anger as a result of a perceived offense, difference or mistake, and/or ceasing to demand punishment or restitution.

Here are my top 10 picks for the best quotes on forgiveness of all time. Enjoy, and please pass them on to anybody you think might need a little help moving on in their life.

#10.) “When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” —Catherine Ponder

#9.) “Gandhi was right: if we all live by ‘an eye for an eye’ the whole world will be blind. The only way out is forgiveness.” —Sidney and Suzanne Simon

#8.) “Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” —Paul Boese

#7.) “Forgive all who have offended you, not for them, but for yourself.” —Harriet Nelson

#6.) “Without forgiveness life is governed by… an endless cycle of resentment and retaliation.” —Roberto Assagioli

#5.) “Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were.” —Cherie Carter-Scott

#4.) “Never does the human soul appear so strong as when it foregoes revenge, and dares forgive an injury.” —E. H. Chapin

#3.) “Not to forgive is to be imprisoned by the past, by old grievances that do not permit life to proceed with new business. Not to forgive is to yield oneself to another’s control… to be locked into a sequence of act and response, of outrage and revenge, tit for tat, escalating always. The present is endlessly overwhelmed and devoured by the past. Forgiveness frees the forgiver. It extracts the forgiver from someone else’s nightmare.” —Lance Morrow

#2.) “Forgiveness is the answer to the child’s dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again, what is soiled is made clean again.” —Dag Hammarskjold

An the #1 Forgiveness Quote is:

Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself. It is not something you do FOR someone else.
—Larry James

Please leave a comment and let me know what you think of this list of forgiveness quotes.

Life Without Limits

Are You in the Way of Your Own Success?

In his landmark inspirational Bestseller, Illusions, Author Richard Bach said;

“Argue for your limitations – and sure enough they are yours.”

How many times do you want to try something new, take advantage of a possibly amazing, albeit risky opportunity – when that familiar voice inside of you says,

“No I can’t.”

You convince yourself that,

“I am too old”, “not smart enough”, “not strong enough”, etc etc

– and while we argue for those limitations – the opportunity passes, and we remain, just where we are, safe in the Status Quo.

Of course, not all limits are necessarily a bad thing. Speed limits save lives, and there is surely wisdom in respecting certain physical limitations. If you are allergic to bee stings, there is nothing to be gained by sticking your arm in a beehive.

On the other hand there are those among us who are even able to break the bonds of what would appear to be physical limitations. In 2001 Erik Weihenmayer became the only blind person in history to climb Mount Everest. We have all seen the martial artist who can break a concrete block with his head – or the Yogi Master who can walk unscathed across a floor of burning embers. What do they all have in common? A belief in themselves that goes beyond limits.

Now, no one is suggesting that you should believe that you are Superman – and that by the shear power of your will, you can move mountains – but psychologists all agree that there is much to be gained in life through positive thinking, and breaking with many of the limitations we put on ourselves.

Break the Pattern

It seems straightforward enough. If you are unhappy about something, change it. All things in the universe are governed by cause and effect. Any given result is preceded by specific action. If you want different results, you have to change the pattern of the preceding action. You cannot expect to lose weight if you keep eating donuts for breakfast every morning. The same goes for getting ahead – you won’t achieve your goals until you get rid of the self-doubts and limits that are weighing you down.

Negativity

Philosophers, motivational speakers, and psychologists alike say that one of the greatest limiting factors we put on ourselves is Negativity. Negativity breeds fear, negativity saps your strength and the strength of those around you.

Arun Gandhi, grandson of the great Mahatma Gandhi has said,

“Think Positively for Thoughts Become Words
Speak Positively for Words Become Actions
Act Positively for Actions Become Values
Practice Positive Values for Values Become our Destiny”

We are bombarded with negativity. Throughout our lives certainly we hear the words “no”, or you “can’t do that” far more often then we hear “yes.” Those who are truly successful in their lives or careers, purge themselves of negativity and concepts such as “I can’t.”

Failure

It is not failure that holds people back. It is the fear of failure. The only difference between success and failure is the number of times you get up, after you have been knocked down. You only fail when you refuse to get back up again. You are probably familiar with the many famous “success stories” that were built on failures. But in case you need to be reminded again, consider these real life examples:

• The first children’s book written by Dr. Seuss was rejected 23 times, but the 24th publisher sold six million copies.
• Michael Jordan was cut from his High School Basketball team.
• Beethoven was told by his music teacher “as a composer he is hopeless.”
• Walt Disney was fired from his first job with a local newspaper because the editor said he “lacked imagination and had no original ideas.”

And the list can go on and on with names such as Abraham Lincoln, Bill Gates, and Harrison Ford, who was told by the Vice President of Columbia films “he would never make it in this business.” It was Thomas Edison who said, “I never failed, I just found ten thousand ways that didn’t work.”

The people in these examples do not have anything that you don’t have. But they all have two things in common, not only a belief in their abilities to succeed, but they all had real practical plans to do so. This is perhaps the most important thing to take away from these examples. Belief is one thing – but faith and determination alone are not enough.

It is true that glass ceilings only get in your way when you see them. But it is more than that – Barack Obama was not only propelled to the White House by his unwillingness to accept that he did not belong there, but by the way he used that belief and drive and resolve. It wasn’t enough for him to say that an African American could do this – he had a plan, and used emerging technologies such as the internet and social media to turn a traditional political campaign on its ear.

You Can Live Life Without Limits

OK, if you accept that self-limiting behaviors are all in your head, how do you overcome them? To live a life without limits you must:

Plan – You have to visualize your goals, and develop a clear plan towards achieving them. Have a specific goal to accomplish every day – the more you accomplish, the more you will believe in your ability to accomplish anything.

Be happy, and be excellent in everything you do. The best way to do that is to live by the 80/20 Rule, focus on the 20% of things that will achieve 80% of your goals.

Dream Big – Understand that there is absolutely nothing you cannot do once you put your mind, heart, and soul into it. Stop arguing for your limitations, let go of your fears, and go ahead fail, – if you can do that, the only thing that can get in the way of achieving your goals – is yourself.

How to Keep Your New Years Resolutions

(Photo: Sally M)

Learn How to Keep Your New Year’s Resolutions

Every New Year we take the opportunity to resolve to do better – to make some kind of change in our lives that will lead to greater success or personal growth – and then by Valentines Day – they are often all but forgotten. However, the idea of making such resolutions is not frivolous.  New Year’s Resolutions are great ways to set goals and start your year off in the right direction – so how to keep them? We will look at that big question below.

First what are the most common New Year’s Resolutions? According to a Time Magazine- Marist poll, the usual: Quit Smoking, Lose Weight, Exercise more. Interestingly enough – the most common resolutions have to do with moderating something – or breaking a bad habit. That being the case, the best advise I can give if you want to stick to your resolutions- take a page from those who have been through successful addiction recovery – and start by:

• Being realistic – Don’t kid yourself. Set realistic goals. Addicts, who start out by saying they will “never” use again, are doomed to failure. But if they say “I will not use today” – or ”this week”, or “this month” – it’s a realistic start. And if heroin addicts can quit that way — you can moderate any behavior you want to change whether that is having a donut with your coffee only once a week – or not losing your temper with your kid.
• Try Cold Turkey – Even if just for a little while, the theory is whatever behavior you want to moderate, drinking, eating, even smoking – abstaining completely even for a little will prove to yourself that you can ”do without” and make moderation in the future – that much easier.
• Have a plan – Decide in advance what you need to do to avoid temptation. Call a friend, meditate, work-out, whatever it is – have a contingency plan in place.
• Use your friends – Or get better friends if they are the ones adding to the behaviors you want to change. But either way, the experts agree that sticking to your goals is better accomplished with the help, and accountability offered by like-minded people. Let the world know about your intentions – the more people that know what you are trying to accomplish, lose weight, quit smoking – the more support you will get from the people around you..
• Change your environment – And break patterns of behavior – if you drive by that same coffer shop to work every morning that is just too tempting – pick another route.
• Be honest with yourself – Psychologist’s say in order to modify a behavior it is important to understand what it is you are getting out of the behavior. For example if you know you are over eating to deal with stress – then find some other healthier substitute – such as yoga – or meditation.

And finally, all of the experts agree, that in order to keep a New Year’s resolution – expect to have a few set backs, and slip ups – but don’t let little failures take your eye off the goal.

Start A Mastermind Group

How to Start a Mastermind Group

A Mastermind group is different from a social club or other networking organization in that it is created with a goal in mind – and holds its members accountable for achieving that goal. The concept was first introduced by Napoleon Hill in his groundbreaking book on personal success – Think and Grow Rich.

It is relatively easy to start a Mastermind group and there are many reasons you might want to, such as:

• Increased access to resources
• Reaching goals in your business and personal life
• Getting past obstacles, ”mental blocks” or anything else standing in the way of your success or happiness
• Specific on-point help with a particular task, with accountability

So then how do you start a Mastermind group? Since the whole purpose of the group is to bring together the power of collective thought to accomplish a given goal, you must first decide what the goal and or focus of the group will be. Are you a small businessperson who needs help with marketing? A medical practitioner who needs to brainstorm on best practice solutions? Or maybe you desire a group not related to business at all but targeted at a social or local political issue. Then of course you need to decide where to meet. While these days it is possible to have a Mastermind meeting online – there is still something about face-to- face brainstorming that gives the Mastermind group its greatest power. Usually a community meeting hall or house of worship will be available for your group meeting. If it is business related, maybe the conference room of one of the members. Whatever location you choose, it should be quiet – and private – not a restaurant or other public place. A Mastermind group meets to work – to get things done, while you may make great friends -it is not a social outing.

Other things you will need to consider when forming a Mastermind group are:

• How to get members? – This depends on the focus of the group you have decided upon. If it is business related, try ads in the business section of your local newspaper or Chamber of Commerce, or newsletter of a related trade organization. You can also use, Facebook, Myspace, Craig’s List, Meetup, or any number of other social networking sites, as well as “old-fashioned” methods like posting flyers in your local library, community center, or coffee houses.
• What size should the group be? – Up to you. A typical group is 3- 6 persons, but a Mastermind group can be as few as two people.
• How often will you meet? Weekly is best, for an hour to 90 minutes.
• Commitment and confidentiality -. No matter how long you choose to have your Mastermind group meetings, or how often, it is important that you get a commitment up front from people to attend each and every meeting – or your cause is lost. It is also important that people feel they can discuss anything in the group in confidence and it will not be shared outside of the group, especially as it may relate to propriety business practices. Many groups ask their members to sign a Non-discloser agreement (NDA).

You do not need to register your group as any kind of “official entity”, collect dues or anything like that. In fact, in its truest sense, the traditional Mastermind group does not charge any fees, or have any “officers” but is created in an egalitarian philosophy for the good of the whole.

How Helping Others Helps Ourselves

(Photo: Helga Weber)

Helping Other People Will Aid In Your Own Personal Development

“Do Unto Others…” The well familiar  “Golden Rule” is not only great words to live by. Many experts agree that the key to achieving your own success and happiness – starts with helping others find theirs. And it seems from corporate America to individuals, people are getting that message.

While a recent USA Today study found that charitable giving in terms of dollars was way down last year – volunteerism is up. In fact a similar study conducted by the University of Minnesota found that 1 in 3 adults does some kind of volunteer work. There are many reasons why people might volunteer, from a passion for community service, to just a selfless and fundamental need to help those less fortunate. And while the very nature of volunteering is giving of oneself without expecting anything in return – those that give back, may be receiving quite a bit as well. Simply stated it feels good to help other people. But beyond that there are many other personal growth benefits to reap by helping others.

Through volunteering you can:

• Learn a new skill, or practice ones that need improving.
• Use skills or training you do have, but are not given an the opportunity to use on your full-time job.
• Meet new people, make new friends, and become more aware of issues in your community.
• Fulfill a curiosity about how a particular organization or agency works or operates.
• Gain a greater understanding of other people, other places, or other cultures.
• Fulfill perceived humanitarian, moral, or religious obligations.
• Meet people that share similar goals and values.

Helping others can help you to find your place in the world. Volunteerism builds self-esteem, and can make you feel that you are doing your part to make the world a better place – and the truth is you probably are.

To all those who may think there is something inherently wrong to volunteering for some kind of personal gain, many psychologists argue that there is no such thing as true altruism, and every human action is driven by some kind of motivation. But more importantly, what is the harm? Who is hurt by the person that gives to a cause or a charity because they know they will get something out of it? The charity? Certainly not, they need as many good volunteers as they can get. In fact, many psychologists who study empathy and altruism – suggest that if charitable organizations can learn more about the why people give back – and can address more of those motivations – it will only help them gain and keep more good volunteers.

No matter the reason – volunteering is the ultimate “win-win” – so get out there and start helping yourself by helping others!

80-20 Rule

The 80/20 Rule – Your Formula For Personal Success

You are probably familiar with the 80/20 rule, or the Pareto Principal, although you may not have heard it exactly referred to as such. By definition the Pareto Principal is the concept that for any given event, 80% of the effect comes from 20% of the cause. It was named for an Italian economist, Vilfredo Pareto, who in the early 1900s observed that 80% of Italy’s land was owned by only 20% of its people. Since then the 80/20 rule has been applied to everything from profitability in business, as in “80% of your sales come from 20% of your clients” — to the “bean counting” actuarial practices of major corporations; such as when Microsoft believed it could solve 80% of the problems with Windows, by fixing only 20% of the bugs. It can also be applied to your personal success and happiness.

In our careers, if we accept that 80% of productivity comes form 20% of the people, it would seem that those who are driven to succeed are the “twenty-percenters.” Twenty-percenters are self motivated, and dedicated to personal growth. The 80% are those who are content in doing only their job description, happy to ride the coattails of the 20%. As an interesting aside this has lead to a management style known as Superstar Management, where a company will focus its efforts in supporting the 20% – or the “superstars” who are doing most of the work. But this is really a flawed application of the principal. Those companies would be far better off spending 20% of their time improving the performance of the slackers!

In our personal lives the exact proportion 80/20 is less important than an understanding that the principal is valid. This means that for any given aspect of our personal life, a large part of any result is driven by a small amount of effort. Take happiness for example. Applying the Pareto Principal, this means that 80% of our happiness is created by 20% of “something.” So instead of running around trying so many different things to make us happy – find those few things that you know to truly make you happy, and concentrate on those – and stop wasting time and efforts on the rest.

The same applies to relationships. Instead of trying everything you can to please your spouse or partner –understand that there are only a few little things that really make that person happy, or attracted to you – and concentrate on doing just those, and you will have a much more successful relationship.

The real lesson of the 80/20 rule as a way of life is, in any given situation focus 80% of your time and energy on the 20% of things that really matter – and you may just wind up being 100% better off!

Why Be Normal

(Photo: Fuzzy Gerdes)

Do You Need to be Normal to be Happy?

I remember a popular bumper sticker that read “Why Be Normal?” It is a good question. It seems that as human beings we strive for “normalcy” – if by normal we mean conformity. There has to be some level that a society defines as “Normal” – or we run the risk of total anarchy.

As youngsters, we feel immense pressure to be normal – to fit in, this is why most teenagers look alike, sound alike, and like the same music. As adults, a definition of normal and accepted group behaviors is what allows groups as diverse as cooking classes to networking organizations to function.

Yet, what is so great about normal? Is not another word for normal ordinary? Who are the heroes in your life – the people you admire? Would they be considered “normal?” or extraordinary? Were Galileo, Gandhi, Mother Teresa, Einstein, even John Lennon or Elvis for that matter –considered normal? While there is probably something very basic to survival that drives normalcy, the instinct that keeps one from “standing out from the crowd” so as not to be picked off by a lion on the plains of Africa – also stifles creativity.

Certainly, there is security and reassurance in adopting the “normal” behaviors of a given group. Conformity provides a sense of assurance, well-being – and identity. I am sure there are many people perfectly happy to be normal. There is a certain comfort in complacency. And yet, I believe there are just as many of us who are straining at the bit, just dying to break out of the constraints of normalcy – and for them the road to true happiness is not to be just like everyone else – but to dare to be considered different!

There are many things that can stand in the way of happiness and success. Having a negative self-image is certainly one of them. However, a misplaced belief in what you think you need to do to be considered “normal” can be another roadblock — and one that is often overlooked. Renowned motivational writer and speaker Wayne Dyer, wrote in his book Excuses Begone, that we need to make a list of all the things we are “unwilling to do to achieve the life we want” –with the ultimate goal of having a blank sheet.

Now, I am not suggesting being weird for weirdness sake, and that you go to your next networking meeting dressed as a chicken. However in each of us there is an opportunity to step beyond our comfort zone just a little bit, and in doing so you might surprise yourself, and others with just how extraordinary being “abnormal” can be!

Finding Happiness

(Photo: Laura  Taylor)

What Really Makes You Happy and Can Anyone Find Happiness?

To be sure happiness is elusive – there are those who might even say it is an illusion. How does a person gauge happiness? Certainly throughout our lives what we think will make us happy changes – at 6 probably all it took was a heavily frosted cupcake. As an adult, what is it? — a great job, a wonderful relationship, an African Safari? Or is that confusing happiness with wants or desires? Our Founding Fathers knew that happiness is something we all want, but also realized that it is something to be sought after, but not necessarily obtained, as they guaranteed us the Right to the ”Pursuit of Happiness” and not the right to “Be Happy.”

Most experts agree that happiness is much less about the things we do or the things we have, or even our achievements and accomplishments – than it is about the choices we make. In fact, many believe that happiness itself is a choice. Abraham Lincoln once said, “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” How you view the world and your place in it is a conscious choice. You can choose to find happiness in the little things, or choose to see only the negative. With the exception of certain clinical conditions and psychological abnormalities beyond the scope of this discussion, never doubt that happiness is a choice. We all know people that seemingly have everything in life, and yet are miserable, and others with little or nothing, that appear very happy. The difference is a conscious choice. To those who say – “that’s absurd, we have no control over outside horrible or tragic events – so we cannot choose to be happy.” That is true, you cannot choose whether this, that, or the other circumstance occurs in your life – but you can choose how to react to it, or think about it, and that is where the choice to be happy – or not, comes in.

There is a common myth, started by miserable people no doubt, or Ebenezer Scrooge, that most people find happy people silly or annoying. Actually, recent studies have found the opposite to be true, happier people have more friends, are married more, often stay married longer, and are more likely to succeed in their chosen careers. The same studies found that happy people are thought of as friendlier, warmer, less selfish, more attractive – and smarter, by their peers. That last one is interesting, because the idea of the “happy idiot” or “ignorance is bliss” – still pervades a lot of peoples thinking – but research has shown that there is no correlation whatsoever between happiness and intelligence.

So how then can we choose to be happy? Much has been written about that. The first step is to find a way to control negativity and negative emotions.  Follow the 80/20 rule, and find those few simple somethings that make you happy and do those. Do not dwell on the past, or the future – and I like the particular sentiments in this ancient Chinese Proverb:

If you want happiness for an hour — take a nap.
If you want happiness for a day — go fishing.
If you want happiness for a year — inherit a fortune.
If you want happiness for a lifetime — help someone else.